Sunday Favorite: 97

For obvious reasons, this is my Sunday Favorite. In case you don't get it, let me spell it out: 

B-E-A-R

I'm starting to get nervous about the roof tear off tomorrow. I know I've already committed but it seems that once they do begin the work it really will happen. I'm nervous for Winston and how he'll react to the noise. My parents offered for me to take him to their house but that would freak him out too!

I'm also starting to get nervous about the new job. It's still a couple weeks away but I'm starting to worry that I won't be as smart as they may expect. Yes I really said that. I've been reading up on organization development just so I can get some terminology under my belt. I don't want to appear inexperienced or uninformed. I also worry Winston will miss me during the day! Silly I know since all he does is sleep anyway.

Oh wait...I think all this nervousness was just gas. My bad.

BEHR HUGS

Sunday Favorite: 96

I love this picture...there's nothing like jumping into the arms of the man you love and giving him a big smooch. You can tell this isn't just sex or making out...this is PASSION. 

We finally had rain in the LA area! It started sometime last night - possibly about 9pm where I am. I noticed about 9:15pm. It rained fairly good off and on throughout the night. The driveway is still damp as is the patio. But it as raised the humidity. I seriously feel as if I'm in the deep South. Poor Winston is having to put up not only with the humidity but with his Daddy fanning himself, saying "I declare!" When it gets like this my inner Scarlet O'Hara comes out. 

I accomplished something yesterday that I've been needing/wanting to do but kept putting it off. I finally changed my kitchen faucet! Shortly after I moved into my house - within the first couple of years, I'm sure - I had changed the original faucet to a Delta. Because I have "hard water" that causes calcification and rust rather easily, the Delta faucet eventually started rusting and leaking. So I bought a new faucet for much less than I paid for the Delta...and yesterday switched it out. Now this new one is far more simple than the Delta. But it will do. And I'm proud of myself for changing it out without help. I usually run into some kind of problem. I really need to learn to do more things for myself. The feeling of accomplishment is nice.

Tonight I start taking care of my sister's menagerie for a few days while she attends a conference. Two cats, a dog, two tortoises, and nine turtles. I don't mind taking care of the cats and dog but the reptiles are a little involved with their feeding routine. Thankfully she wrote everything down. Oh and I got a little lecture on the difference between tortoises and turtles. OY! It was rather interesting though when we walked out to the turtle enclosure - they all came running out of the grass, heads held high! Okay maybe "running" isn't the right term but they do move faster than expected. 

Last night I watched Disney's latest princess offering, "Frozen." It was okay. I liked Sven the reindeer. I was a bit confused because I know Disney has been pushing the Elsa character but the story really is about the sister. They should have gone ahead with the original evil Snow Queen approach rather than trying to make her a sympathetic character. And I could have done without the stupid snowman Olaf. But what can I say...it's formulaic Disney. "Brave" was far better.

That's about all I have for this Sunday. 

BEHR HUGS

Sunday Favorite: 95

Not much to report this morning except I felt three good aftershocks during the night. I slept better overall, which is good considering I hardly slept Friday night. Winston spent most of yesterday and last night under the bed. This morning he finally came out and ate. He's currently sacked out on the sofa about a foot or so away from me. Poor guy is just a wreck.

I upgraded my iPhone to the newest 7.1 iOS. Can't tell that it's made much difference.

On the other hand, I upgraded my Macbook to the new Maverick OS...not sure I'm liking it but I don't have much choice. Whereas in the previous version new windows opened, Maverick opens new pages in tabs. I learned the difficult way by closing the window and being back at a blank screen rather than the screen I started at. A little frustrating. Also, the scrolling bit is opposite so one scrolls up to move the screen down. At least I think that's what I'm doing. It probably won't take too long to adjust.

We're anticipating cooler and wetter weather this week. Something about April showers? 

Hope everyone is well. We're just hanging on, here.

BEHR HUGS

Sunday Favorite: 94

Congratulations to Team USA...so far we've taken two gold and two bronze medals at the 2014 Olympics. And those two gold medals? Taken by Sage Kotsenburg and Jamie Anderson in the inaugural Slopestyle Snowboarding events - Mens AND Ladies! Awesome!

Yesterday I accomplished a task that has been hanging over my head....I did my taxes! That's right, thanks to TurboTax, half-way decent record keeping, and an adding machine I prepared and e-filed my Federal and State taxes. Since I tend to be a procrastinator it's a huge relief for me to do it early. I'll be getting a little something back from both Federal and State (no, the Bank of Mark is not open). 

Today started Hell Week for the next show at the local community theater. I'll be working backstage primarily with props and set dressing. The stage manager didn't show up today for move in and there was quite a bit of grumbling. He's a nice enough guy, tends to get a little overly hyped up, and a bit demanding. I've always thought he was kind of cute and would do anything to blow him but I'm not his type. He likes the pretty boy type. But I digress. So this week I'll be going to the theater every night. 

I'm taking Friday off so I can sleep in and catch up. I'll also be taking my parents out to lunch to celebrate my Dad's birthday. Since I'm involved with the show I can't go with the family out to dinner so I asked if he'd go to lunch with me. I had to convince my mom that it includes her too. 

It's hard to think that Downton Abbey, Season 4, only has three more episodes. I know that's how they roll in the UK but here in the States we're used to more episodes per season. What will happen to Edith? Will Alfred realize Daisy loves him? Will Bates kill the man who raped his wife? 

That's about all for now. Enjoy your week, everyone.

BEHR HUGS

Sunday Favorite: 93

It's been a while since I've truly blogged and for that I apologize. There's been lots I've wanted to say...but I cannot help but fear the loss of your respect and friendship. So it's best sometimes to swallow my bile and be silent.

The New Year has started out at a frantic pace. I've been busy at work - learning new classes to conduct, creating online tutorials, helping with the pilot of a new class - and it's nice to be busy. Unfortunately, it hasn't made the days go by any faster. They've been dragging their sorry asses.

There's something I need to do this year and soon: lose weight. At my three-month checkup I weighed in at 316 pounds, my heaviest ever. Oddly, the doctor said nothing (but I got a good tongue lashing from my mother). I know I need to lose weight; my joints hurt, it's difficult to move, I sometimes feel out of breath, and finding clothes to cover my ample frame is getting really expensive. I still have my gym membership but I just cannot seem to find the motivation - or nerve - to walk back in. Silly, I know, since I've paid the membership fee since joining in 2003. I hate crowds and while I know logically no one is looking at me, I fear everyone is "laughing at the fat man." I wish I had someone to go with. That would make it easier. Back in the day I used to go early in the morning....I'd be at the gym by 4 am. I am not certain I can do that again. And at the end of the day I really don't want to go. See? Excuses.

Today is Super Bowl Sunday. I'm rooting for the Denver Broncos despite they being in the AFC. Normally I root for the NFC team but I just cannot root for Seattle; last week's game against the 49ers was atrocious, especially in the referee calls. Here's hoping the refs in today's game are more unbiased. Oh! And here's hoping all those involved are better sportsmen.

I'm looking ahead to the end of April when I'll take a couple days off for my birthday. Not sure what I'll be doing. I may go back to Arizona for D'back games (baseball). Or get a room at either the California Grand or the Disneyland Hotel for a couple of nights. Maybe I'll take a trip to Solvang or Santa Barbara. Not sure yet.

Today's picture was garnered from someplace on FB I believe. I really don't remember. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do (click it to see it slightly bigger).

BEHR HUGS

Sunday Favorite: 92

For obvious reasons.

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Sunday Favorite: 91

It's Autumn! There's a nip in the morning air and the nights are cooler. Only the days still reflect the heat of summer. Major League Baseball continues to drag on in its interminable season...not that I care since my boys - the Arizona Diamondbacks - blew their National League West number one position after the All-Star Game. And now we have football reigning supreme on Sundays. I'm not much into football but do try to follow one team - you guessed it - the Arizona Cardinals. They're not doing as well as they could but not as worse as some other teams.

I've been feeling fairly beat down lately. I've been dealing with a cold for over a week, which as you know can wear one down physically. I'm also fairly beat down emotionally. I've mentioned O occasionally here...he's someone I've been hanging out with quite a bit for the past year and a half. Against my better judgment I started developing feelings for him. I thought he was doing the same. We've both said the "L" word (no, not lesbian!) and I know we both enjoy each other's company. 

Last weekend O and I were supposed to go to lunch with a friend of mine. Since I woke up with a cold, I decided to cancel as I really didn't need to pass it on and I needed to get over it. I was disappointed because I really wanted to see O but he said he understood and for me to not be upset, that I need to rest and get well. He reminded me that he loves me and all will be good. What a guy, right? Later than day I texted him to see what he was doing and he was out with friends walking about in LA. He mentioned feeling lonely though. I asked him about that and he said he's still in love with his ex-boyfriend and can't stop thinking of the guy. WTF?! O decided he needed to be alone so he can work things out. He did text a couple days later and I tried to respond neutrally. I initiated another conversation on Thursday and told him that I only want the best for him even if it doesn't include me. He responded that he does want me in his life, that I've made a positive impact on his life, but that he needs to get over this other guy. Evidently O doesn't feel anything for me, otherwise this other guy from his past would not be an issue. Or am I wrong about that?

So here it is Sunday and I've been alone all weekend. I had a good conversation with a friend I haven't talked to in a long time (this was live on the phone!) and I saw my folks for about an hour yesterday. I didn't go over there today because my mom isn't feeling well and I'm still hacking up globs of green gunk from my lungs. Sorry - TMI? I want to text O but then I feel that if I do I'm swaying him or bothering him or sounding desperate.

I used to say that being alone doesn't mean having to be lonely. Today...I'm feeling alone. I don't understand what is wrong with me...I'm educated, employed in a good job, I own my own truck, own my home, am a loyal friend, and oft times overly generous...I don't think I'm that bad looking although for a majority of the population I could stand to lose 100 pounds. 

Since this is a mystery to me, I've decided I need to reevaluate my life. I need to figure out what it is I want, who I want in my life - romantically and platonically, and where I want to be in five or ten years, etc. I need to make a plan and execute it. So I've started a period of soul searching.

I'm open to advice...both positive and critical criticisms...please feel free to comment or email me (see sidebar). It's probably too late to do this sort of thing at age 50...but what the hell. I'm tired of being on the brink of happiness to have it snatched away.

BEHR HUGS

Sunday Favorite: 90

On this past Friday night I had a nice phone call from my friend who - with his partner - moved to Illinois last year. They're in the Los Angeles area house sitting and they've decided to "tie the knot." They've been together for about 20 years and FINALLY their union will be legal. He was calling to invite me to their as yet to be planned post-nuptials dinner party. 

A female coworker informed me last week that she and her partner of 17 years also made a trip to the County Clerk's office and officially got hitched.

A coworker in my department announced a couple of weeks ago that he and his partner (not sure of how many years, double digits though I believe) also have officially gotten married.

Love - and equality - is in the air!

As for me, I continue to be single although seeing a bit of O still. Not sure if we're friends with benefits, fuck buddies, or boyfriends. I'm not questioning it. He's grown a lot since we first met: now employed, paying rent to his father, and being a responsible adult. He's also grown in size! He's gained weight, which looks good on him, and he fits my idea of "cub" or "bear" although such labels are unimportant. Last Saturday we spent a major portion of the day together and had a really good time. I enjoy his company and he finds me attractive so there's not much to question. 

One more week! Then we have our long Labor Day weekend. I'll be taking the other four days off that week. I've only had five days of vacation so far this year. That leaves me 17 days to take by year end. So I decided that would be a good time to knock off four days.

I'm looking forward to Gay Days this year; my friends Roger and Dave will be coming down from Washington again. I hope to be able to hang out with them. They're really woofy and friendly and just really great guys.

Does anyone have a pet-safe remedy for ant invasions? I've dealt with ants this entire past week. Every night when I've gotten home I've had to battle them. Poor Winston's food takes the brunt of it. I've tried the Blue Dawn, the Bounce dryer sheets, boric acid...nothing seems to keep them from coming into the house. And most times I cannot tell where they're coming from! It's frustrating. I'm thinking of calling an exterminator that a friend with pets uses.

That's about all of an update I have. Boring! 

BEHR HUGS

Sunday Favorite: 89

Today I am off to the Santa Monica Beach with my Mom for the Arthritis Foundation Walk. I've done this walk for the past several years and have blogged about it before. Thank you to my friends who have supported me. My Mom asked if I wanted to skip it but I said no...I think we should go. It'll be good.

The past few days have been difficult for me...I'm doing better but know the worse is to come. In my last post I told you that my friend Rosalee passed away. I've been an emotional wreck. Just about the time I think I have a hold on it I start crying again. It's been most difficult at the theatre where Rosalee was an integral part of the workings. Each night at the end of the show when the audience begins applauding I start crying. Rosalee would have loved this show. She would have laughed and laughed and had witty things to say. She will never experience the joy of performing again.

Friday night I had a call from Rosalee's sister. She called to tell me about Rosalee and to ask me to be a pall bearer at the service/internment on Thursday. She said that they realized they needed them and her younger sister said "Markus." That touched me, made me feel honored, and totally ripped my heart out. Her sister said "She loved you so much." 

I have a rough work week ahead. Lots of classes and a little traveling to the Inland Empire but just for one day. It'll be about an hour drive each way if I'm lucky. The drive home will probably be rough. 

In addition, my Mom shared today that she's having another medical procedure. Without going into too much detail she's upset about it (there's a hassle with having to have changed doctors) and she's afraid of what they'll find. So that's weighing on my mind as well.

Thankfully there are no rehearsals until Thursday and that's cast only; stage crew not required. Yippee!!

So that's the update as of this morning. I certainly hope all of you out there are well.

BEHR HUGS

Sunday Favorite: 88

I love this picture...I think it should be titled "Perseverance." It reminds me of all those times I've stubbornly hung onto something - an ideal, a favorite piece of clothing I've outgrown, a relationship - despite the obvious futility of doing so. 

I'm back from my short birthday trip to Arizona. I had a good time and am glad I went. I'm sorry I had to come home but truth is, I missed Winston. When I woke up Friday morning I had placed a pillow next to me sometime in the night, obviously to feel as if Winston was cuddled up next to me.

I'm unfortunately not feeling up to blogging about the trip. I feel like I'm barely holding onto my sanity. I don't want to go into details; I guess my birthday week is really over and reality has crashed over me.

Hope everyone is well - BEHR HUGS

Sunday Favorite: 87

Off to the world famous Rose Bowl in Pasadena for the National Kidney Foundation 2012 Kidney walk...here's hoping the rain waits until I get home!

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Sunday Favorite: 86

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Sunday Favorite: 85

Classic profile...beard...hairy chest...this picture evokes thought, strength, desire, serenity...I think it would make excellent wall art. 

Or at minimum a magnet for the fridge.

I had a great time on my Friday night date. We met at Faultline and enjoyed a couple of beers. Something that struck me about him is he was very tactile, something I didn't expect from a muscle bear. It was really nice to stand there and talk and have him rubbing my chest, back, belly...and oh yes, there was quite a bit of kissing too. After the second beer we went to his place to get to know each other better. Biblically speaking.

Originally we were going to meet Saturday night as well; when I heard from him he had a headache. I wasn't feeling 100% either so I suggested a rain check on the night despite it being his birthday (we'd already "celebrated" earlier in the morning *wink*).  He agreed; I promised to make it up to him. He's a nice guy if not a bit intimidating. But it's really nice to be with someone in his 40s. I'm certain we'll be seeing each other again.

I'm excited - I have one work week left before I take one week's vacation! I mentioned previously that I was hoping to go visit Bear but unfortunately a miscalculation of finances is going to preclude that trip. I'm disappointed; I'm in need of a Bear fix. You may remember my last trip to see him in June. Since I won't be taking a mini-trip, I'll be having a Staycation...there is plenty to do around the house and the Southland so hopefully I'll have something interesting to blog about when the time comes.

So there you have it...that's what's going on with the Behr. Today I'll visit my parents, catch up on a few minor chores, and of course the season premiere of Amazing Race.

Enjoy your day!

BEHR HUGS

Sunday Favorite: 84

Love me some Latin bear! Woof! This guy - whose name I don't know unfortunately - was a contestant in the recent BearsLA "LA Bear and LA Cub" contest...believe it or not he didn't win either title. I wish I'd been there; I would have consoled him into the wee hours of the morning.

I am usually not one to "toot my own horn" but I just have to say - the Behr is FUCKING AWESOME!

Let me explain...as I've blogged, the local community theater is doing Fiddler on the Roof and I'm on the stage crew (with the quick stage cross as the priest). My responsibilities include raising and lowering the grand (main red curtain), opening and closing the midblack travelers (a black curtain), setting props in place for the actors, moving set pieces, and generally assisting the stage manager in ensuring the show runs smoothly. 

If you're familiar with the show, you know at one point Tevye tells his wife a "dream" in which Fruma Sara, the long departed wife of Lazar Wolf, the butch who wants to marry Tzeitel, Tevye's daughter, threatens Tzeitel with death should she marry Lazar. In our production, the woman who plays Fruma Sara stands on a raised platform and is pushed around the stage by one of the actors. Tonight when I arrived at the theater I found out that the actor "strained his back" and is on bed rest. It fell to me to push the woman around.

She's no light thing, either. She's rather on the heavy side, which makes pushing the unit difficult. We ran through the scene twice before the curtain went up. I did it, with one small error (moving her before she finished her song, which she TOTALLY fucks up every performance) but overall it went well. Many of the cast told me how great I did. I really "saved" the show, so-to-speak. The Director told me I am the best "Fruma unit mover EVER!" So make note: I. Am. Fucking. Awesome. It was really nice to have the actors express their thanks and appreciation tonight for all I do. I don't seek glory or applause or compliments but it's nice to get them.

I kind of hope the actor is out for the rest of the show! It's not easy pushing this woman (due to her weight and the floor of the stage is not a smooth surface) but I feel confident that I could do it for the remaining three performances.

Today we have a matinee...it's going to be hell since because of the heatwave. But I'm confident we'll give one of the best performance of the run.

So I'm exhausted. Thank goodness for an after-show beer!

Hope you're all enjoying your weekend.

BEHR HUGS

Sunday Favorite: 83

A handsome muscle bear for today's favorite seemed right for some reason. I'm mesmerized by his nipples. Well...maybe not just those.

As I mentioned in my last post, I'm involved with the local community theater. I'm on the stage crew, something I enjoy. Opening night on Friday went VERY well. I also have mentioned that I walk across the stage in the opening number as "the priest." Here's my costume:

I look fucking AWESOME! Here's the miracle of theater magic: one of the women made the headpiece; it's an inverted black lamp shade! She took out the metal piece that would be screwed onto the lamp to surround the bulb; then she put foam padding on the inside of the smaller end then covered it with a piece of black cloth. to cover the top and hang down the sides/back. Here's a close up shot:

To complete the look, I have on a backwards choir robe and a necklace with a jeweled cross of sorts. It's not perfect but all it has to do is look good up on stage. And to be honest, I'm onstage literally for 10 seconds tops, just long enough to make a cross from stage left to stage right. It's fun; it's like being part of the cast as well as being a stage hand.

Last night's show went well; we had to hold the curtain because of a line at the box office...our matinee performance is sold out - that's nearly 400 seats! We received a really rave review from the local theater critic based on our opening night. The hard work has paid off.

The only downside is I've strained my lower back. I move set pieces, do all of the curtain pulls (except one so I can move a huge set piece) and I'm sure that's all contributed to the strain. Thankfully I have all week to recover.

So that's about all the news I have. I hope everyone has had a grand weekend.

BEHR HUGS

Sunday Favorite: 82

A big beautiful bear out in nature....*swoon*

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Sunday Favorite: 81

Reminiscent of the old Coppertone ad - Bear Style! 

(click to enlarge)

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Sunday Favorite: 80

What is YOUR dream?


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Sunday Favorite: 79

I'm  a pushover for a handsome man out in nature. Especially a furry man...seems natural and "right." The background of this picture reminds me the Devil's Postpile campground near Mammoth Mountain, where I spent many summer vacations with the family. It was often the starting and/or ending point of long term hikes with my Scout troop. At certain spots there is a gorgeous view of the Minaret Mountain range, which includes Mount Ritter (over 13,000') and Banner Peak (just under 13,000'):

During my backpacking years I climbed Ritter twice and Banner once. Great experiences and such beautiful country. Of course, we only had day packs and not our full gear! We didn't necessarily rock climb but more boulder hopped and rock scrambled. I remember my first time climbing Ritter...I was probably 14...and we had to pass along the glacier that lies just below...we even walked under the glacier shelf - it was massive and scary! The view from atop both peaks is exhilarating, if not a bit frightening for those of us with a fear of heights and falling.


Once when backpacking with my parents and brother (long before he became estranged from the family), we came across a bear in the woods. The animal kind, not the human kind. It was bounding away from us. I'll never forget watching that big bear's butt as it went up over a rise in the landscape.


Hopefully if I came across the human bear kind he wouldn't run away but up to me and - well you know. *grin*


Happy Sunday!


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Sunday Favorite: 78

I'm off to Nevada today for the work week. Wish me luck as I travel through the desert to America's Playground a/k/a Sin City. As I mentioned I'm not much of a gambler and not much of a drinker these days. The hotel/casino I'm staying at has movie theaters, a bowling alley, several restaurants, a pool and other amenities. So once the work day is over I shouldn't be bored. I'm also taking a book. LOL! 


Did I mention that the forecast is for 105-degrees every day?


Today's favorite lives in Sitges.  I've chatted with him on Growlr and aside from being drop dead gorgeous, he's a really nice guy. Oh and he wears glasses, too:

Woof! And Grrr!


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