26 June 2010

Behr Blue: Date Update

My "date" cancelled on me.

I'm not terribly surprised and not terribly upset, to be honest. There were some red flags over the past week and by this morning I was fairly certain it was going to be a bust. Thankfully I have a backup plan (it's called Netflix).

He left me a message on the bear social networking site saying he was sorry but has to cancel our plans. I replied that I am sorry too and then I asked why. I don't expect an answer and I certainly doubt I'll hear from him. No harm no foul, eh?

OK maybe I am a little upset. I could start questioning what's wrong with me but this time I'm not doing that. I don't think I was dishonest or flaky or even remotely ax-murderer-in-waiting-ish. Maybe it was my sense of humor he didn't get. Or maybe someone better came along - and by that I mean better for him, certainly not better than me. And if that sounds arrogant, I apologize, but I may not be perfect but I'm a good catch. I'm kind, thoughtful, employed, have a working vehicle, own my home, have a sense of humor, and a variety of interests. I guess in today's world that's not something guys want. This experience is exactly why I don't date often; guys either cancel on me or turn out to be the freak du jour.

I'd appreciate some advice on finding decent, honorable, trustworthy men. Especially from all of you partnered men out there: how the hell did you find one worth keeping? It is perhaps a good thing that I learned long ago that being alone does not have to mean being lonely.

So that's the 4-1-1 on my date situation. The Behr bombs again! (I say that with a smile.) I hope your weekend fared better than mine. BEHR HUGS!!


SteveA said...

Hi - I'm sorry your date cancelled :((. It's his lost). Dating is so hard - I am happily partnered, and I guess it was just by chance. I was not looking and I was all set for life by my lonesome - then it happened.

I think you need to keep dating - keep on the social networks. And don't get disappointed by a hitch - hey like you said "you're worth it" and "a good catch".

Cubby said...

Awww, I'm sorry Mark. I echo Steve's advice.

All I can add is that when dating make sure the two of you are on the same page... you're not looking for a quick poke, you're looking for a potential mate. If he's not in the same mindset, move on.

Greg and I met by chance too. I didn't know anything about him, but our first real date went well and it just snowballed from there. You can't find a mate unless you date, so don't stop dating!

Kyle said...

Good grief Mark. So sorry you had to deal with a cancellation. Don't fret. You are a catch, so it is his loss. I agree with Steve and Cubby on their advice. Much like Cubby and Steve, Stan and I met because we took a chance.

One thing I would add, if you are not active in different activities, you might want to think about adding that to the mix, if you have the time. Sometimes just getting out and dong something new or brushing up on something, or going to new places, brings people, and new opportunities into your life.

Wonder Man said...

I echo the same as the others. You are a catch and he will come when you least expected. I met my guy at the comic shop and I had no idea we will be together 6 years later

Michael Rivers said...

If I ever know the answer, I'll be sure to pass it on. Hope you're weekend is going okay. It's 11:30pm on Saturday and I'm watching a Netflix movie too. :-)

Bear Me Out said...

I'm sad he canceled on you! And thanks to all for the advice to Behr. I need it too!

Howard said...

I am the last person who needs to be giving any advice. I haven't dated in, well, forever. But if the guy couldn't recognize the fantabulousness that is Behr, don't fret about him any longer. He isn't worth your time. Hugz!