10 November 2009

Words of Wisdom

The following post (my 275th) is something I got from a good friend several years ago. I believe it makes a lot of sense. Our friend over at Tales of the Sissy posted a list of "I believe" statements, which prompted me to post this. I'm warning you: it's long. But it's good. I'd appreciate feedback but won't be too upset if there isn't much. I hope it touches a part of you - whether it be your brain, your heart, or your soul. As always, BEHR HUGS!!

A time comes in your life when you finally get it. When, in the midst of all of the fears and insanity, you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere the voice inside your head cries out - ENOUGH! Enough fighting and crying and struggling to hold on. Like a child quieting down after a blind tantrum, your sobs begin to subside. You shudder once or twice. You blink back your tears of emotion and look at the world with new eyes.
This may be your awakening. It's time. Time to stop hoping and waiting for something to change. For happiness, safety and security to come galloping over the next horizon. Realize that any guarantee of "happily ever after" must begin with you. In the process, a sense of serenity is born of acceptance. You awaken to the fact that you are not perfect. Not everyone will love, appreciate or approve of who or what you are. No problem. They are entitled to their own opinions. The important thing is loving and championing yourself. A sense of new found confidence is born of self-approval.
Stop complaining and blaming other people for the things they did to you (or didn't do for you). The only thing you can really count on is the unexpected. People don't always say what they mean or mean what they say and not everyone will be there for you. Because it's not always about you. Learn to stand on your own and take care of yourself. A sense of safety and security is born of self-reliance. Stop judging and pointing fingers. Begin to accept people as they are and overlook their shortcomings and frailties. A sense of peace and contentment is born of forgiveness.
Realize that much of the way you view yourself and the world around you is a result of all the messages and opinions that have been ingrained into your psyche. Begin to sift through all the junk you've been fed about how you should behave, how you should look, how much you should weigh, what you should wear, what you should do for a living, how much money you should make, what you should drive, how and where you should live, who you should marry, the importance of having and raising children, and what you owe your parents, family, and friends.
Learn to open up to new worlds and different points of view. Reassess and redefine who you are and what you really stand for. Begin to discard the doctrines and values you've outgrown, or should never have bought into to begin with.In the process, go with your instincts. Learn the difference between wanting and needing. In giving, we receive. There is power and glory in creating and contributing. Stop maneuvering through life merely as a "consumer" looking for your next fix.
Learn that principles such as honesty and integrity are not the outdated ideals of a bygone era but the mortar that holds together the foundation upon which you must build a life. Learn that you don't know everything. It's not your job to save the world. Distinguish between guilt and responsibility. And the importance of setting boundaries. The only cross to bear is the one you choose to carry and martyrs get burned at the stake. Then learn about love. How to love. How much to give in love. When to stop giving. When to walk away. Look at relationships as they really are and not as you would have them be. Stop trying to control people, situations and outcomes.
Realize that alone does not mean lonely. Stop working so hard at putting your feelings aside, smoothing things over and ignoring your needs. Feelings of entitlement are perfectly OK. Want things and ask for the things you want. Sometimes it is necessary to make demands. You deserve to be treated with love, kindness, sensitivity and respect. Don't settle for less. Your body really is your temple. Care for it and treat it as a holy place. Eat a balanced diet, drink more water, and take more time to exercise. Being tired fuels doubt, fear, and uncertainty. Take more time to rest. Just as food fuels the body, laughter fuels your soul. Take more time to laugh and play.
You get in life what you believe you deserve. Much of life is a self-fulfilling prophecy. Anything worth achieving is worth working for. Wishing for something to happen is different from working toward making it happen. In order to achieve success, you need direction, discipline and perseverance. More importantly, no one can do it all alone. It's OK to risk asking for help. The only thing you must truly fear is the greatest robber baron of all: FEAR itself. Giving in to fear is giving away the right to live life on your own terms. Fight for your life and don't squander it living under a cloud of impending doom. Step right into and through your fears. Whatever happens, you can handle it.
Life isn't always fair. You don't always get what you think you deserve. Sometimes bad things happen to unsuspecting, good people. Learn not to personalize things. Learn that the universe isn't punishing you or failing to answer your prayers. It's just life happening. Learn to deal with evil in its most primal state --the ego. Negative feelings such as anger, envy and resentment must be understood and redirected or they will suffocate your life and poison the universe that surrounds you. Admit when you are wrong. Build bridges instead of walls.
Be thankful. Take comfort in many of the simple things we often take for granted. Things that millions of people upon the earth can only dream about: a full refrigerator, clean running water, a soft warm bed, a long hot bubble bath. Slowly, begin to take responsibility for yourself by yourself. Make yourself a promise to never betray yourself and to never, ever settle for less than your heart's desire. Surround yourself with things and people who make you happy and inspire you. Make it a point to keep smiling, to keep trusting, and to stay open to every wonderful possibility.
Finally, with courage in your heart and Spirit by your side, take a stand, take a deep breath, and begin to design the life you want to live as best as you can.


Nik_TheGreek said...

Amazing post...
Thanks for that.
The things you mention I believe are things that everybody more or less knows but usually forgets...

Breenlantern said...

I am keeping it to read over again and again.
I am linking to this on my blog and sending people here to read it.
You have moved me this morning.

Mark in DE said...

A most excellent post!! So many thought-provoking statements. This should be a how-to book entitled "How to Become an Happy, Authentic Person".

A Lewis said...

Right on Mr. Behr! Never have more perfect words been written. Appreciate your good thoughts.