Edward "Chip" Sarafin, offensive lineman at Arizona State University, has publicly come out as gay. He is believed to be the first openly gay major division college football player.
Read more here especially a word from the Sun Devils' coach, Todd Graham.
Can I just say that I'd jump this bear's bones in a heartbeat. WOOF! And congratulations Chip. You're my hero today.
BEHR HUGS
Since my birthday is this weekend, I took yesterday and today off from work to make a "long" weekend and to kill off a couple of vacation days. Last year for the "big" birthday I went to Phoenix and caught a couple of ballgames (go D'backs!) but this year I decided not to spend the money. I decided to stay close to home and do local stuff...yeah yeah I'll hit Disneyland on my birthday because I love wearing the "Happy Birthday" button and having cast members say happy birthday when you know damn well they don't want to. I'm kind of evil that way.
So anyway, yesterday I took my parents to the nearest retail outlet mall - Citadel - primarily to do shoe shopping. I also picked up some underwear. (I know you were all dying to know that.) I had received a couple of "birthday discount" emails from stores at the outlet and thought I'd poke through. One such store was Van Heusen, maker of men's dress clothes (shirts, slacks, suits, ties). I was looking through the ties and some big guy started talking to his wife. Based on his accent it was apparent he was not American (perhaps South African? Australian? New Zealander?). He was telling her that he was thinking of "getting the grey one but I decided it was too gay."
I let a couple of beats pass before I said "I hope that's gay as in happy."
I was a bit surprised at myself. I didn't say it TO the man but more "talking out loud." I doubt he heard me as I said it in a very matter-of-fact, normal tone of voice.
It got me to thinking that perhaps I should approach the guy since there were two young boys in tow with this couple...I wanted to tell this brute that he was spreading his ignorance and his bias to his kids and - since they probably were 7 and younger - there is always a strong probability that one of the two young lads could be gay themselves.
I didn't want to cause a scene, just tell the guy that he needs to STFU when it comes t such comments. But...I didn't take it any further. Does that make me a coward?
BEHR HUGS
For my first Flashback Friday, I wanted to share the above watercolor painting of a San Francisco street scene. It was given to me by the artist, Bob Serrano, in 1987 (the year after I graduated from college).
Back in the day...and I mean BACK in the day...the only ways to find "like minded men" was to either go to a gay bar, a gay bath house, a bookstore, or by placing an ad in the Pink Pages of the Advocate magazine. As a 21 year old, I opted for the latter because it seemed to be the thing to do. Not surprisingly, an ad stating I was 21, a virgin, and exploring my sexuality yielded many replies. Oh and let me clarify: this was through snail mail. I had rented a PO Box for my correspondence and all mail I didn't want sent to the house (I lived at home and commuted to college).
One of the (many) respondents was a gentleman named Bob. We corresponded erratically until we finally talked on the phone. This was probably in the 1984-85 year. We finally met for dinner one evening. I don't recall where we met but he picked me up and we went to dinner at Charlie Brown's and then we went down to Laguna Beach to a country club to talk and share some wine. That country club had a lovely pool room. *wink* I probably should have been freaked that this man fucking me was a little older than my mother - but I didn't let it bother me.
Bob, who was 28 years older than me, became my personal and academic mentor. We discussed gay life and Bob introduced me to the finer side of being gay: the smart clubs, the smart cocktails, the scuttlebutt on closeted celebrities, all those tidbits that make a newly out boy awestruck. I'll be honest: Bob introduced me to some very interesting sexual techniques as well. I was eager to learn. But it wasn't all personal; he advised me academically although he worked at a different college. I interviewed him for one of my writing projects (on which I got an A).
Bob was an artist and often his work appeared in gay porn magazines as "accompanying art." Often his picture was hotter than the story. We talked about many great things and I admitted to having a desire to see San Francisco again, having been there on family vacations and on high school band tours.
I graduated from college in 1986 and got involved in the local theater, got a full time job and unfortunately my time with Bob became a thing of the past. We reconnected once more - I won't bore you with the story of how he played a trick on me with a very hot motorcycle cop - where after satisfying each other sexually, he presented me with the water color as a remembrance. I tried to keep in touch via letters; he retired and moved to San Luis Obispo to care for his ailing mother.
In 1989 I took a road trip to SLO and looked him up. As I walked up the driveway he stepped out and asked what I wanted. He didn't remember me and that kind of hurt but knowing he "advised" many frat boys for Sigma Phi Epsilon throughout his career it was understandable that any young man walking up his driveway was not unusual. We talked and made plans for dinner that night. After dinner, we went to my motel and had one last round.
I'm not certain when Bob passed away; in the 1990s I tried looking him up in SLO but the phonebook had his brother's name. I called, inquired about Bob, and found out he had passed. The brother wasn't very friendly or forthcoming with information so I assumed that Bob passed from complications of HIV.
I came across the watercolor recently. I put it in a frame and now have it hanging in my bedroom. I learned so much from Bob and he was a good friend. I hope he enjoyed life to the fullest until the end.
BEHR HUGS
