Behr Followup

Thanks to all who commented on my previous post; I appreciate it. A little followup:

My position was eliminated...so really this blog had nothing to do with it. I highly doubt that they knew about it since I rarely if ever accessed it from the work computer. Anything I've said in my blog about my work, job, or company (all former) has been generic without specifics.

As for contacting an attorney...while the separation agreement DID indicate that I should consult an attorney (at my own expense), I did not. I went ahead and signed the document and mailed it back yesterday. There's no way I would ever win in court and I would end up losing more than I could ever hope to gain. Besides...my job elimination was business not personal. I wasn't discriminated against because there are others in my department who are triple threats - over 40, female, and of color. I only fall into two protected classes: over 40 and LGBT. I was low man on the totem pole position-wise. (Yes yes that makes me sound like a big ole bottom. Get yet minds out of the gutter! *grin*)

I had a conversation with one of the Business Partners a few days ago. I told him how disappointed I am with how it was handled - not being able to say goodbye after 18 years, the hush-hush slip me out the door manner, not being able to sufficiently gather my personal belongings, and just the overall feeling that I had done something wrong although I hadn't. He appreciated my feedback and we talked about why it is handled that way. It was a fairly decent conversation. 

I've heard from a couple of people who are shocked about it. But I know life for them - and me - goes on. I've filed for unemployment (yes, I'm eligible although I'll be getting severance pay). I've poked around some career sites and started to play with my resume. I haven't told many of my friends. I'm not so sure I am going to. What's the point? I don't want sympathy. And I know that people don't know what to say. However...I know some of my friends have been through this before and they may have good advice. 

Today is the first day that I haven't gotten up out of bed right away. I just wasn't feeling it. I think it's catching up to me. This past week has gone by so quickly...I cannot believe it's Thursday already. I'm trying to maintain a positive outlook and keep my sense of humor. Misery loves company - a guy I've chatted with on the bear social networking site and who wants to meet me told me he lost his job last Friday too. It must be an epidemic.

So that's where I am...not much further along but not too far back. Hope everyone is doing well.

BEHR HUGS

How the Staycation is Progressing

I've been on vacation all week and today was the first day it truly felt like it. It started, of course, last Friday night when I joined my two dear friends Dan and Mark for the wedding celebration dinner at their favorite Italian restaurant. It was a nice gathering of old and new friends and the food was delicious...the lobster bisque was divine.

I awoke on Saturday with one of those nagging headaches that tells me I have a sinus problem. I lived with the pain through yesterday when I finally got antibiotics. Hopefully on the mend now.

On Saturday, Omar came over and we went out to eat then returned to my place to watch "Wreck It Ralph" and a second movie that now escapes me. Yes to all of you nosy nellies....we also engaged in coitus. *grin*

Sunday I worked in my yard, trimming the overhanging trees from the neighbor's yard. My parents helped (long story but it was much appreciated) and we had a nice lunch of green salad, pesto pasta salad both made by moi and little sandwiches made by Mom. To relax, we watched "The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel."

Monday was spent lounging and napping, trying to get rid of the sinus headache.

Tuesday I had an eye appointment...I'll be getting new spectacles and the lenses of my sunglasses changed out. I also spent time going to the pharmacy twice and waiting for my damn antibiotics!

Today I went to the movies, saw "Blue Jasmine." It's a typical "let's start in the middle of the story and end in the middle of the story" Woody Allen film. All of the performances are fine, especially Sally Hawkins as Ginger. The standout performance is of course Cate Blanchett as Jasmine. Her mental breakdown and attempt to maintain her social and mental standing while trying to cope with the loss of her money, husband (a sexy Alec Baldwin who unfortunately does not remove his shirt), son, social position, and sanity. 

After the movie I waited around for Omar to get off work. We had a really nice dinner and then went to  Barnes and Noble to look around. We ended with dessert at Beard Papa's. It was really nice to see him fully clothed in the middle of the week. *wink*

Tomorrow I'm going to attempt Disneyland. Imagine my surprise when I looked up their hours and find they're only open 10am to 7pm. And no fireworks. Damn. My thought of going when the kids were in school might backfire. It's okay, that's probably way too much Disney at once. Omar and I have tentative plans to see "The World's End" at Downtown Disney.

So that's how the staycation is holding up. Oh...did I mention it's been bordering 100 degrees? Yes, it's been freaking miserable. Poor Winston does nothing but sleep in the closet and in the cooler living room where the window A/C is running practically 24/7. How does one order an Arctic cold front?

BEHR HUGS

And So It Starts

What starts, you may be asking yourself after reading the title of this post and - if you're breathing - checking out the incredibly hot beach daddy. Well let me tell you.

This starts my "birthday week." Now, I normally don't advertise my birthday because I generally don't care for the attention. I may be an ENFJ but I'm an odd ENFJ. I'm making an exception this year because it's a milestone birthday.

I'll be 50 on Friday.

As of this writing, it doesn't bother me. Oh it mystifies me somewhat, but overall I'm okay with my age. Maybe it's because I don't feel my age necessarily. There are times in my head I think I'm still in my 20s. Maybe that's why I've been dating 20-something year olds for the past 8 years.

I think it helps that many people tell me I don't look my age. A female coworker was shocked to find out I'll be 50. She thought I was in my 30s! I told her fat people always look younger.

I'll be working Monday and Tuesday but taking the rest of the week off. I would have liked to have taken more time off but work has interfered. I'm still struggling on finding time to take some extended vacation. I considered going to England but for various reasons I dropped that idea. Mainly that I don't want to travel alone.

And perhaps that's the one downfall of this birthday; I realize how alone I am. Now, that doesn't necessarily mean I'm lonely, just...alone. I have many friends who I love dearly but not many of them can afford to go on a trip with me. And stingy old bastard that I am, I don't want to pay someone else's way. Yeah it's the selfishness in me. That's one train the horoscopes never tell you about Taureans.

I will be taking a mini-trip though. But first let me back up. Today, Sunday, I treated myself out to breakfast. I use to do this quite often but I have found that I need to follow a specific diet and that makes eating out a bit difficult. I can manage but prefer to just cook/eat at home. But today, I went out. Nothing special, French toast, but it was nice. I even went someplace I haven't been to in years.

I'll be working Monday and Tuesday. Tuesday night I'll be having dinner with my friend Roger (see Gay Days 2012) who will be in the area for work. Wednesday morning I'll seeing Rosalee for breakfast. I'm excited about these two meals...two really great people. And of course, with Rosalee it's ultra-special.

On Thursday I'll be driving to Phoenix, AZ and going to a couple of baseball games. I've been an Arizona Diamondbacks fan ever since they became an expansion team and fully supporting them despite changes in managers and team colors. I have no idea what I'll be doing during the day on Friday since the game is in the evening but I'm sure I'll find some trouble to get into. After all, Phoenix is the city of my birth and I thought it fitting to spend my day there.

The rest of the weekend will be spend driving home, spending time with family and prepping for the following work week. Not overly exciting but hey! at my age one can't have too much excitement. LOL

So there you have it...I'll be taking a mini-trip back to my birthplace to celebrate my milestone birthday. I've know of a couple of restaurants I want to visit (it's always about food with me). I'm looking forward to it and I'm getting a bit excited.

BEHR HUGS

Naughty Behr

OMG! I just got back a few minutes ago from doing something I have NEVER done before...I met a guy on GROWLr while at work. We met at a neighboring parking structure and had an incredible makeout session in his car! It was HOT. I worked his nipples over real good and he played with my manhood, going so far to even taste me. I tell you, if we didn't have to get back to work I think we would have gone a lot further.

I stopped to get a milk black tea boba as an excuse for being away from the office. I feel so naughty!

BEHR HUGS

Behr Catchup

I hope all of my American friends and followers had a nice Thanksgiving. I myself have a lot for which I'm thankful: my family, my home, my job, my friends.  I'm thankful my health situation isn't worse. I'm very thankful that I have Winston. 

Friday was my Mom's birthday. We all met at the movie theater in the morning and saw "Life of Pi." We saw it in 2D since 3D prices are outrageous and my Mom prefers 2D. Spectacular movie. Gorgeous cinematography. A thought-provoking, soul-touching story. Amazing acting, especially by newcomer Suraj Sharma. I highly recommend this movie. I want to see it again so I can hopefully pick up on things I missed.

On Saturday I went to lunch and the cheap movies with a friend to see the Disney-Pixar movie "Brave." Who can resist Billy Connolly, Emma Thompson, Julie Walters, and Kelly McDonald voicing Scottish characters? It was cute and funny, on par with their other movies. Like the other movie, I'd like to see it again to catch the things I missed. For example, I totally missed the Pixar Pizza Planet truck and a hidden Mickey!

I have three full weeks of work before taking the last two weeks of December off. I'm hoping they go quickly and - most of all - painlessly.

BEHR HUGS 

Behr Monday

This is how I wish I was spending my Monday morning...instead of going to work as usual. At least it's a short week for me, three work days. I'd gladly trade my two days off for one morning with this bear.

BEHR HUGS

2012 Kidney Walk

For the third year in a row, I will be participating in the local National Kidney Foundation Kidney Walk on Sunday October 21. Like other events of this nature, the focus is to raise funds for research, awareness, and to bring sufferers of kidney disease and those who support them together for "the cause." 

So why does the Behr participate?

In 2003, when I joined a gym with a friend, my pre-workout screening revealed that my blood pressure was incredibly high. My friend made me swear to see the doctor...and so I did. My doctor ran some tests, prescribed high blood pressure medication, and - thanks to the blood test - had me do a 24-hour urinalysis. The end result was proteinuria, which means there was too much protein in my urine. My doctor referred me to a nephrologist (Dr. M), who confirmed the diagnosis.

By this time I'd been going to the gym 6 days a week, ingesting protein drinks, and dropping fat and gaining muscle. I thought it was my diet and honestly scoffed at what seemed to be a knee-jerk reaction. It wasn't until Dr. M ordered a kidney biopsy that I started thinking maybe this was something I should pay attention to. The results of that biopsy were inconclusive; the only thing my doctor said was that he thought it was congenital, meaning it is a condition I was born with. In discussing the various symptoms, I realized I have had those symptoms all of my life. Who knew something was off if you don't know anything else?

So for the past 9 years I've been seeing Dr. M fairly exclusively. He's seen my blood pressure be brought under control, a gain in my weight, and a step closer to diabetes. He's not always happy with my weight but honestly that's a whole other Oprah.

Last year Dr. M ordered a second kidney biopsy. Some of my numbers had changed and not for the good. He wanted to see if perhaps this time there would be something more conclusive. Sad to say, there was.

He officially diagnosed me with focal segmental glomerulosclerosis (FSGS). Basically it means that I have scarring in my kidneys and that is what is causing the high amounts of protein to pass through my urine. As you may know, our kidneys filter the bad stuff in our blood and what passes out of the kidney eventually becomes our urine.

I was prescribed an immunosuppressant, one that is generally given to patients who have had an organ transplant. It's a relatively new treatment idea and the hopes is it will reduce the rate at which the scarring occurs. There is no known cure.

We all have something called GFR, or glomerular filtration rate. The higher the number the better. Depending on one's number determines the "stage" of kidney disease. I'm at stage 2, one point from stage 3. Stage 5 represents kidney failure; that means either dialysis or organ transplant. So I'm not doing too badly.

Three years ago I saw the advertisement for the first Los Angeles area walk. I attended alone. Last year my mom joined me despite her own health issues (including arthritis, another 'cause' we support). She plans on attending this year with me unless her health doesn't permit it. While I do the arthritis walk for my mom, this one is for me.

I'm not good at asking people for help. It's the stubborn Taurus in me. But this last year has shown me that I do indeed have a serious condition. I know so many of my followers are also struggling with health issues. Many people live with kidney disease and don't know it. Ironically, I don't fit the usual demographics. But that aside...I'm reaching out to this blogger community. If you feel so inclined and can help, all donations are greatly appreciated. Here's the link to my page:

Mark's Kidney Walk Page

If you cannot give monetarily, then I ask that you have yourself checked. It's a simple blood test and pee in a cup. That simple. It could save your life.

Thank you for the opportunity to share this story. It's been one I've hinted at but not shared. I felt it was time.

Just so you don't feel cheated, here's a pic of a hot daddy:

BEHR HUGS

Back Home

I'm back home from my work trip to Nevada. It's SO nice to use my own shower again!


My drive over took 4 hours; I shaved off 10 minutes on the return drive - not bad for a Friday afternoon.


The work part of the trip went very well, better than I had hoped or anticipated. The "off" time was okay...I don't gamble so I spent a lot of my time roaming around watching others or in my room watching NCIS reruns. I know - I'm pathetic! I did play $5 and at one point almost doubled my money but like anyone who is playing penny slots, I kept going and lost it all. *facepalm*


The weekend will be spend doing laundry, getting groceries, and re-bonding with Winston. He was obviously upset with me but soon he was sitting next to me, rubbing his face all over my hand and purring up a storm. He did get a little miffed again later on because I stayed up to watch the Olympic Opening ceremony. He conked out finally in the hallway, looking cute.

I didn't see the beginning of the Opening Ceremonies but came in just before the Mary Poppinses flew in. It may have not been as stellar as other countries but the lighting of the Olympic Cauldron was absolutely gorgeous, elegant, classy and spectacular...what an awesome message, that one generation inspires the next.

Hope everyone has a great weekend. BEHR HUGS

Out of HiBEHRnation

That's right Behr Fans - - I'm back!


During the past three months I came to realize that I really missed blogging. Sure, I was doing my best to stay abreast of everyone's blogs...but it just wasn't the same. I found myself commenting in paragraphs rather than sentences on other blogs. I also would come across an experience or situation or news bite about which I definitely had an opinion; so I decided I should look into returning.


I sent an email to several supporters and asked their opinion. The responses were overwhelmingly positive and very very touching. A few brought tears to my eyes. 


Onward! Let's catch up, shall we?


I've undergone a few changes since I've been gone. One minor change is I have removed my nipple ring permanently. What's that? You didn't know the Behr was pierced? Ten years ago I had my left nipple pierced as a "last hurrah" before turning 40. I alternated between a ring and a bar. Those who saw it often were taken aback; evidently I don't look the type. Anyway, one day I noticed that the the piercing was red and swollen; possibly due to my weight gain. So I took out the bar to give it a rest. It actually bled a little, too. A couple days later I attempted to replace the ring but couldn't get it in (I hate that). So since it's been 10 years and the novelty is pretty much over I left it out. Thanks to some nipple clamps and a snakebite kit, I'm regaining sensitivity in the previously pierced nipple.

Was that TMI?

In April I had an opportunity to attend a 3-day workshop during which I was certified by the company (Achieve Global) to lead leadership and customer service training programs at the deliver and develop levels. It's actually a big deal. This portable certification allows me a broader range of training that I can deliver. It makes me a "grown up" trainer. Now hopefully I'll be able to increase my training repertoire beyond just systems training. Forgive me, but a moment to brag...the Master Trainer in charge of the workshop told me at the end of the competency that she knew I was certified on day two...she just couldn't say anything. Huzzah!

Also in April I celebrated my 49th birthday. I was a bit torn about not celebrating in a big way since the world was slated to end this December (and thereby depriving me of the pleasure of greeting my 50th birthday) but decided it's really just another day. Then the other Mayan records were found in Guatemala and now it looks as if I will have to face the big five-oh. 


One of the reasons I thought I would stop blogging was due to a health issue. Good news! Things have gotten better on that front. I'll blog about that another time. (That's called a cliff-hanger!)

Last but not least:
It's National Donut Day!

BEHR HUGS

Behr Exchange

Behr: Whatcha doin?

Him: Just sittin here at work, fukken sleepy.

Behr: You're having sex with a dwarf at work?!


BEHR HUGS

Behr Vacation: Day 1

I hate to rub it in, but I'm on vacation this week and next, returning to work on January 3. In my line of work, the last two weeks of the year are slow and it makes sense to take the time now. Although there are issues of weather at times, and the holidays, I enjoy having these weeks off.

Today I went to the Disneyland Resort (DLR), mainly to try to get into the holiday spirit and also to do some shopping for a last Christmas gift for my sister. I started off at California Adventure, which is under renovation and improvement since this park never really took off. Whenever I go to DLR, I must - absolutely MUST - have a corn dog.

It is one of my guilty pleasures. Thank goodness for iPhone!

I only rode a couple of rides at California Adventure, The Little Mermaid ride, which opened earlier this year that I had yet to ride and Soarin' Over California, which takes the riders up into the air with hang glider movements over a film of Southern California locales. I then went over to Disneyland, which was so horribly crowded I didn't ride anything. I had a bite to eat then left the park to go to the big World of Disney store in Downtown Disney to shop.

On my way home I stopped at a few stores and finally found a last gift for my mom. This completes my gift shopping! This is a huge relief, as I'm sure you can imagine.

The rest of the day was spent wrapping presents, doing a little laundry, and watching movies while Winston slept on my lap. Bliss!

If the rest of my vacation days go like this it's going to be a very good vacation!

BEHR HUGS!

Coffee Behr Update

This morning my cute papi barista informed me that tomorrow is his birthday.

He turns 21.

*sigh*

BEHR HUGS

Behr's Weekend Recap

The weekend went well. Our Friday night show went well and there was a lot of excitement about the show winding down. Because I still felt punky with a cold, I didn't go out afterwards.

On Saturday I met an online acquaintance for lunch. He was visiting the local mortuary park and wanted to meet up. We ate at this little cafe spot, Mimo's, and sat on the patio. It was nice and pleasant and no awkwardness. Or at least very little. We walked back to our cars and he gave me three bottles of wine! I thought that was very sweet of him.

The show on Saturday went very well and ended on an exceptionally high note. The boyfriend of one of the female leads, Heather, stepped out onto the stage right at the end of the curtain call, dropped to his knee and handed her a ring. You could have heard a pin drop! Poor Heather didn't know what to say. Another girl said "You're getting married!" to which Heather finally said "YES!" The entire cast and crew were caught up in the moment and there were a lot of tears and laughter. Couldn't have happened to a nicer girl.

Sunday was the charity walk for the National Kidney Foundation. My mom went with and did the 1 mile option while I attempted the 3 mile option. I'll be honest: I didn't quite finish. I was in desperate need of a restroom and decided not to try to "hold it." I ended up cutting through a parking lot. Still...I walked 95% of it! And the important thing was raising the money.

I'm taking Friday off so it's a short week for me. I just hope it goes by painlessly!

BEHR HUGS

Coffee Behr

I'm in love with my barista.


I used to be a die-hard Starbucks fan. I even have one of their "gold" reloadable cards that earn me stars and eventually a "free" beverage. But after realizing I was spending a small fortune on coffee and being slightly abused by the staff - and not in an S&M dungeon fantasy way - I slowly backed off and left the Starbucks family. I drop by occasionally for a late afternoon pick me up but otherwise, they lost my business.


About a month or so ago, I decided to stop in a Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf, which, here in the Los Angeles area, is the "rival" coffee stop to Starbucks. CBTL is slowly growing but not at the fanatic "let's take over the coffee world" pace that Starbucks has grown. They have their own line of coffees, teas, mugs, machines, pastries, etc. and their prices pretty much equal that of Starbucks.


So like I said, I stopped in one humid hot morning for an iced Americano, which is four shots of espresso to the two at Starbucks. Anyway, I started popping in to CBTL every other morning or so and one of the baristas, Nick, quickly learned my name. He's a cute papi with a tattoo on the inside of his right forearm (I think it's a name). He's also got this cute little dusting of hair on his upper back just below his neck, a small little patch of chin hair and a slight moustache. He has one of the nicest smiles too.

But more than the fact that he's cute, it's his warm smile and his conversational "How are you Mark?" that makes me feel appreciated as a customer. I know the game of baristas and cashiers and checkstand folks: kill 'em with kindness and they'll come back. In the case of Nick, it's working. As long as this cute papi is taking my beverage order, flashing that smile, and giving me that look like he'd like to drink me...I'll keep going back.

Besides....the coffee is far superior to that other place.

BEHR HUGS

Behr Sunday POV

Evidently the Rapture didn't happen. As you're all aware, Harold Camping predicted that those folks who were pure (or Christian or whatever) would be "taken" and the rest of us would be destroyed by earthquake. Camping is a nutcase and I think everyone - or almost everyone - knew it. I feel sorry for his followers who were insistent that it was going to happen. If Camping knew anything he'd know not to fuck with God. The Book of Revelations - presumably the same place Camping got his prediction - tells us that no one knows the day or hour. So a prediction for the end of the world is pretty lame. Still, I'm glad that it didn't happen because I like my life, even if I'm not the best person.

Today is the Gay Pride parade/event in Long Beach, which is a suburb of Los Angeles. This event has grown in size and I know many who attend it in lieu of attending the LA one because it is "nicer." So to my local gay brothers and lesbian sisters, Happy Pride. Enjoy yourself, have fun, and be safe.

BEHR HUGS